toki:toki Elepen

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Could somebody please help me revising the following text?

toki Elepen li toki sin pi ante li pona tawa sitelen toki ma. ona li jo e pona mute:

1. ona li jo e lipu lili pi lipu wan taso. ona li sama li toki Italija li toki Espaņa.

2. ona li toki ante e lipu pi toki lape. jan lili ale li ken toki e ona lape lape lon tenpo lili.

3. ona li jo e kalama pi pona lili kepeken lipu sama pi ma ante.

4. ona li jo e ante lili pi ante tawa nasin lili pi jo e wawa tawa pana e nimi sin.

5. ona li jo e nasin pi pona lili pi jo e lili wawa. nasin ni li sama li nasin pi nasin pi ma mute.

6. ona li jo e nimi pi toki Italija li toki Espaņa li tawa jo e wawa pi nimi pi toki Inli.

7. ona li jo e nasin pi kalama e nimi pi jan lawa pi toki pi ma ante, nasin pi toki ante pi ma ma.

8. ona li jo e nasin pi wile pona tawa jan li ken toki e toki Italija li toki Espaņa, taso ona li sama lili tawa jan ante pi kama sona lili.

mi wile e ni: sina pilin pona tawa Elefen!

This is the text in English:

Lingua Franca Nova (“Elefen”) is a language designed to be particularly simple, consistent, and easy to learn for international communications. It has a number of positive qualities:

1. It has a limited number of phonemes. It sounds similar to Italian or Spanish.

2. It is phonetically spelled. No child should have to spend years learning irregularities.

3. It has a completely regular grammar, similar to the world’s creoles.

4. It has a limited and completely regular set of productive affixes for routine word derivation.

5. It has well-defined rules for word order, in keeping with many major languages.

6. Its vocabulary is strongly rooted in modern Romance languages. These languages are themselves widespread and influential, plus they have contributed the major part of English vocabulary.

7. It is designed to be naturally accepting of Latin and Greek technical neologisms, the de facto “world standard”.

8. It is designed to seem relatively “natural” to those who are familiar with Romance languages, without being any more difficult for others to learn.

We hope you like Elefen!

Thank you.

toki Elepen li toki sin pi ante li pona tawa sitelen toki ma toki pi ma ale / toki pi ma mute. ona li jo e pona mute:
1. ona li jo e kalama lili taso lon nimi. kalama ona li sama li toki Italija li sama toki Epanja.
2. ...
seme? ni li toki ala e ijo sama a!
Hi, I'm sorry to say that this would go beyond a simple revision. Starting with point 2, it seems to be talking about something completely different. So what you would need is not someone revising your text, but completely retranslating it. Hm, in case you've been using ChatGPT to do this, I should inform you that even with the improvements in version 4, which isn't available to the broad public yet, it's still at a beginner level when it comes to toki pona.
One way or another, this wiki, which is for articles that are exclusively in toki pona, wouldn't be the right venue.
jan Ke Tami (toki) 2023-05-09T20:54:41 (UTC)